August 31st, 2020 - The Sand Banks, 1861

Dear TNY,

Jesus Fucking “The Sand Banks, 1861” Christ.

What’s the fucking point?  I’ll take a stab at it: You want to be culturally relevant.  

But as I’ve stated before, if the art doesn’t stand, then the attempt at relevancy just comes off as trite.  This story is fucking BORING.  It’s a bunch of loose posturing and stereotypes that stumble along, attempting to find narrative stride, eventually closing by letting down the only real beef in this story, that being the last line.  Because this story spends most of its time being proud of itself, it overshadows what could have been the transcendence at the end, rendering this story into another beige TNY piece:  something to read and forget. 

Like, where’s the turn?  Where’s the discord?  The juxtaposition?  The complexity?  This story reads exactly like we’d imagine a story like this would read.  The characters are hollow at best, built on layers of cliché that stretch back to Twain (who, by the by, at least lived through it). 

Wouldn’t, and this is just a wild thought here, it better serve our culture to publish material about what’s happening right fucking now by people who are in it (also, the part you commonly miss, make sure it’s real Art)?  Nah, fuck that.  We’ll run with lifeless historical fiction instead.  Maybe next week it can be a ghost story.  Followed by a YA novel excerpt about vampires in Forks, WA.

I will say, with no sarcasm (for real), it was nice to read a story that wasn’t about the struggles of a New York writer trying to write New York tat.  Maybe keep that going for a bit and you can hit on a story that actually sings.

Ugh.  Mondays.

Nick

P.S. – If that dugout was in the water (it appears it was), with no one in it (no matter how full it was with oysters), with no outriggers (as they were not included in the description), it would have rolled the fuck over the moment the gunwale was unweighted on one side to take a step. Even if it was cleat-hitched.  It’s a fucking log.  So, again, if your details aren’t researched, then you look like idiots.